A number of famous/ amusing quotes PART 1

"We can repair anything. (Please knock hard on the door - the bell doesn't work.)" - Sign on door of repair shop

...that is his excuse for the dogs mess that I find hard to swallow.

640k ought to be enough for anybody. -- Bill Gates, 1981

82% of people that took part in our opinion poll said they didn't like opinion polls.

A man who smiles when things go wrong knows who to blame.

A verbal contract is not worth the paper it's written on.

After all is said and done, usually more is said.

As easy as 3.1415926535897932384626433832795028841.

Being superstitious brings bad luck.

Don't judge a book by its movie.

Don't spend two dollars to dry clean a shirt. Donate it to the Salvation Army instead. They'll clean it and put it on a hanger. Next morning buy it back for seventy-five cents.

Earn cash in your spare time--blackmail your friends.

Eat, drink, and be merry, for tomorrow they may cancel your VISA.

For every action, there is an equal and opposite criticism.

Golf scores are directly proportional to the number of witnesses.

Good ideas come to those who steal them.

Hard work never killed anybody...but why take chances?

He's a guy who gets up at six o'clock in the morning regardless of what time it is.

I had a really great evening, but it wasn't this one!

I have a God-given talent. I got it from my dad.

I owe a lot to my parents, especially my mother and father.